Kitty Boo

Who the hell care what I have to say anyway?

Pregnancy March 28, 2008

Filed under: Family,Life — Billie Jean @ 11:12 am
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Pregnancy hormones makes a mother to be less smart, but you shouldn’t be focusing on anything else than your baby when pregnant, anyway. Is it the best kept secret? I, for one, had never known that you become such a different person when pregnant because of the hormones. I had always relied on my brain, my brain was my weapon and my shield. Now not only can I not think outside the box but my box has shrunk. It is different than to what I’m use to. It’s unfamiliar and a bit of a pain. Plus I miss the ego that being intelligent gave me. But hey! Anything for my baby. And after having gave birth (scary thought) and breast fed I will be able to view the world through my wide perspective again.

Current situation:

I’m 8 weeks. My partner of almost 4 years and father of baby does not appear to be even slightly ready to become a father at this point so I do now know what will be. Searching for a better apartment downtown, near the central station. Visits to the midwife and other contacts to learn all about this situation from the money, rights and support perspective.

 

Life is only borrowed January 30, 2008

Filed under: Life — Billie Jean @ 12:05 am
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It is 00.35 and I am doing my best to be the most utter exemplary up-stair neighbour. I hate leasehold flats. If I could have it my way in living arrangements I’d definitely have my own beach house, not due eventual respect to neighbours night’s rest but for my own comfort – not having to keep everything low on nights as these when I don’t go to sleep until 2-ish am. Why flats are not soundproof for everyone’s comfort is a mysterious evil to me.

Yesterday all the stress and anxiety I have been experiencing the last month disintegrated from tension to tears. Most is now over and can be left in the past (at least somewhat). The funeral of my aunt was last Wednesday and now my grandmother’s funeral is being planned. On the 22nd of Feb we will say our final goodbyes to her. It has been tough to loose two so loved family members (not everyone are loved) in 1 month only. One due doctors inadequate and one to old age. Mourning lost ones really do take time. I lost my father at 19 years of age but I did not mourn him, it isn’t easy to mourn someone who has hurt you very bad. How close your relative-bonds may be. Sometimes it is only by blood and not heart two people are connected.